What Happens After This?

What happens after this?
When the list has been checked off
When we come to the end of the map
Where will we go?

What happens after this?
We’ll go our separate ways
No longer bound together
We’ll be alone again

What happens after this?
We’ll be on our own
Smaller than we’ve ever been
Struggling to find our way

What happens after this?
We can’t go back
We’re afraid to go forward
It’s terrifying

What happens after this?
Well try to find our way
We’ll stumble through as best we can
But maybe we will fly

What happens after this?
We could go anywhere
We could do anything
How can we choose?

What happens after this?

Who Am I?

Who am I?
Underneath it all
If you strip away the mask
All the labels
All the hobbies
All the friends
All the things I hide behind

Who am I?
At my very core
My deepest self
My truest self
Have I ever met this person?
Would I recognize myself?

Who am I?
Peel back the layers
All the things I call myself
All the ways I define myself
All the people who I’ve let define me
Take it all away
Show me who I am!

What makes me who I am?
What are the things that cannot be taken away?
What should I hold on to?
What should I fight for?
What should I let go of?
Show me who I am!

I surrender myself
I give it back to you
Make me pure
Show me who I am!

Mixed Messages

You have your whole life ahead of you!
Better start planning now

There is a world of opportunities for you!
Make sure you narrow it down

Live while you’re young!
Make sure you’re a responsible adult

Don’t worry about the future!
You need to plan ahead

You’ve got plenty of time!
Don’t waste it

You don’t need to make any huge decisions!
What are you doing with your life?

You can always do something else!
Figure it out now

Do what makes you happy!
Make sure you can pay the bills

So many messages
So many well-meaning advisors

I’m left with one question:
What do I do?

One More Year

If my time was running out
If I had one year to go
I would live differently

I would embrace every moment
Spend time with those I love
Love those I’m with

I would not waste time
Do the things I love
Become who I have longed to be

I would try to make a difference
Help those who need it
Stand up for the little ones

I would worry less
Live every moment
Be fearless

I would travel more
Try new things
Go on adventures

I would give more hugs
Say “I love you”
Smile more

I would mourn for the moments I’d never have
Be thankful for all the moments I did have
See every moment as a blessing

I would appreciate every “last”
Apologize and forgive
Strive to be my best

If I had one year left
One more year on this earth
I would live differently…

But why wait?
Why say “what if”?
I say LIVE NOW!

Embrace every moment NOW
Be your best NOW
Do what you love NOW
Make a difference NOW
Help others NOW
Worry less NOW
Be fearless NOW
Travel NOW
Try new things NOW
Go on adventures NOW
Give hugs NOW
Say “I love you” NOW
Smile NOW
Be thankful NOW
Apologize NOW
Forgive NOW
LIVE NOW!

Do not wait for tomorrow
Our days are numbered
Do not waste them

The past cannot be changed
The future is not certain
Now is all we have

LIVE NOW!

Worth So Much More

You are broken
You are hurting
You feel you are unworthy

You think yourself unlovable

You have been wounded
You have been betrayed
Those who should love you most
Have left you alone

You are lost
You search for meaning, for love
But you are guarded
You don’t want to be hurt again

So many times you’ve been abandoned
So many times you’ve been told you’re not worth it
So many times you’ve had your heart ripped out and trampled on

And you believed the lies

Child, you are loved more than you could ever know
You are worth so much more than you can fathom
You deserve only the best

But you believe the lies

Darling, you are beautiful, you are worthy, you are loved

You were created for big things
Do not settle for “good enough”
You deserve to be happy
You deserve to be loved

But you believe the lies

Why can’t you understand how special you are?
There is no one on earth like you
You are irreplaceable
You are my beloved

But you believe the lies

Abandoned

I feel overlooked
Abandoned
I’m pandering to their needs but no one cares about me
I’m there to make things easier
For them

Things have changed
I’ve become obsolete
There are new, better things to do
New people to meet
I’m no longer needed
Except to clean their mess

I help where I can
Because that’s what friends do
But friendship is a two-way road
And I’m wearing myself thin

I can’t keep covering for others’ shortcomings
They need to learn how to live on their own
I can’t always be so nice
It’s hurting me

I want to be loved for me
Not because it’s easy or convenient
I’m tired of being overlooked
Why don’t they see me?

I’m Sorry

I’m sorry if I hurt you
That was never my intent
It might be too late to change things now
But I want to say I’m sorry

I thought that I was ready
But I jumped in far too deep
I overstepped and tumbled down
And I’m afraid I took you with me

I didn’t know myself like I do now
I thought that I was someone else
I was still trying on faces
And you suffered for it

I thought that I was better, stronger, braver
I thought I could take on the world
I didn’t realize that I am weak
I wouldn’t let you help me

I had big dreams for the future
I wanted to save the world
I thought I could do it myself
And you saw me fall

I have grown up since then
I have gotten wiser
I have been humbled
And I’m ready to try again

I know that I’m not perfect
I have a long way to go still
But I am continuing on
Growing wiser with every step

So I’m sorry if I hurt you
I know that you’ve been wounded
You got caught in my mistakes
I want you to know that I’m better now

I’m sorry if I hurt you
I pray that you can heal
I know it will take time
I hope you can forgive me

Little Girl, Broken

Little girl, brand new
Nothing to fear
Nothing will hurt her
She is protected
She is loved

Little girl, bold
She explores with exuberance
Excited about the world
She is innocent
She is loved

Little girl, bewildered
She discovers pain
The world is different now
She is wounded
She is loved

Little girl, battered
She falls down
And rises with difficulty
She is tired
She is loved

Little girl, broken
She has been hurt
Too many times
She is lonely
She is loved

Little girl, beaten
She looks around
And finds no one beside her
She is defeated
She is loved

Little girl, beloved
She finds her help
They have been there always
She is encouraged
She is loved

Little girl, brave
She stands back up
Against all odds
She is determined
She is loved

Little girl, beautiful
She presses on
Always forward
She is stronger
She is loved

Little girl, broken and brave
She lights the way
For others to follow
She is beautiful
She is loved

Teach Me to Be

Lord, take my pain
Take my worries
Take my anger
Take my frustration
Take my regrets
Take my grief
Take my loneliness
Take my suffering
Take my fear of tomorrow

This is not who I’m meant to be

I want to see you now
I want to hear you now
I want to be with you now
Teach me to be

The time is now
This is the moment
There will not be another like it

God, I give you my mess
I lay it down at your feet

Give me peace
Give me joy
Give me love
Teach me to be

In Stillness

When all is quiet
And we are left alone
And there are no distractions
Only our truest self
What will we find?

When no one tells us who to be
And how to act
And what to think
What will we have left?
Who are we when everything is stripped away?

Will we like what we find?

Or will we fun
And go back to who we thought we were
And wait for someone to tell us who we are

We are terrified of stillness
When we are faced with ourselves
What if we don’t like who we are?
What if we don’t know who we are?
What if we find nothing?

We are terrified of the emptiness

And so we fill our lives
Every moment
So there is no time for stillness

But it is in stillness that we know who we are
Who we have been
And who we might be

And we are terrified

We detach from our lives
We don’t even know who we are

It is time to reconnect
It is time to face our fears
It is time to dig deep
It is time to find out who we are